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  #31  
Old 11-29-2016, 10:21 AM
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This is as far as 12-year-old Taoster got without a walkthrough. I recall the rest of the game being very geometric.
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  #32  
Old 11-29-2016, 10:42 AM
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They seem very chill about all of this. Could have used a fourth guy to scream and then rock catatonically in the corner.
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  #33  
Old 11-29-2016, 12:01 PM
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Originally Posted by JBear View Post
They seem very chill about all of this. Could have used a fourth guy to scream and then rock catatonically in the corner.
For real. Never have three people traveled at FTL speeds across the galaxy so prosaically.
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  #34  
Old 01-15-2017, 10:46 PM
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Default The Final Frontier: A Tiny Patch of Dirt

Remember this? I did, eventually! Last time we left Low, Brink, and Maggie had just been transplanted to an alien world in parts unknown!

Low starts off by trying to eat some of the local flora:



Well, I TRIED to make him eat some of the local flora... Next he investigates the dias they landed here on:





Low is such a neanderthal. With nothing else to really do here Low decides to do some exploring... But of course the peanut gallery he dragged halfway across the galaxy have something to say about that:













Sheesh! Now will you both shut up and just follow me blindly?
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  #35  
Old 01-15-2017, 10:47 PM
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Default Into the Great Wide Open... Kinda

Low thought he had finally got Brink to follow along but the haughty German just had to get the last word in:



I'm beginning to suspect some of these people never should have passed their psych and team evaluations...



That's it? Travelling light years across time and space only to find yourself stuck in giant hole on an alien planet... We've got a couple of options though. We can go left to that little bump, or up to that other bump, and finally up and to the right to that final little bump. Choices!

Low goes left:







Of course they're gone Low! This isn't Halo. It's a Lucasfilm adventure game. you're all perfectly safe and sound. Regardless of where you find yourself.



Going into a wrecked alien space ship does seem like a good idea! What could go wrong?



Low must come from the HP Lovecraft school of storytelling.





Brink doesn't. As the geologist/archeologist pokes around Low gets bored and starts yanking on things:



Nothing wrong with that!



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  #36  
Old 01-15-2017, 10:48 PM
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Default Meet the Locals

And with that Low tugs:



That seems normal. Nothing to see here. Move along Low.









These idiots are never getting off this planet, are they?





Low picks up the wire and the weird thing that seemed to pop out of the "electrical discharge."





Nope, they're all dead. Low looks at the item:



Thanks for the description Low.
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  #37  
Old 01-15-2017, 10:48 PM
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Default By the Book

Low continues poking around the wreck:





I don't know Low. I think that giant arrow in the middle of it might be a clue... Low and company poke around a little but there doesn't seem to be anything else to do at the wreck. So they leave and head up:



(There's a rat/mouse like creature behind the text in that image.



Nope they're talking about the bones. Somehow oblivious to all the alien creatures scurrying about them.





Finally! Thank you! If this is the best Earth had to send out... Now let's wreck it!



Yup, that's what Low is doing. Man of action!



And the best place to find something that will send us across the cosmos is a space rats warren.





Is the whole game going to be like this? These two macho men dick waving at each other?
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  #38  
Old 01-15-2017, 10:49 PM
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Default Desecration Feels so Good

Brink shuts up but you can tell he doesn't like it. Just sitting there glaring at Low:



Wait, weren't you tossing the dirt over your shoulder? How did it get over ther...?



Cool, huh?



Not content with merely digging up alien bones. Now Low wants to take them with him:







Turns out it doesn't matter what kind of alien it belonged to. It's all going into Low's voluminous pockets and used later in ridiculous puzzles!

Next week we explore the final mystery spot in SPACE HOLE!



See you then!

I'm excited.

Are you excited? I am. I'm excited.
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  #39  
Old 01-16-2017, 01:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Falselogic View Post
Low starts off by trying to eat some of the local flora:



Well, I TRIED to make him eat some of the local flora...
Even imaginary characters are aghast at what Falselogic considers fit for human consumption.

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Is the whole game going to be like this? These two macho men dick waving at each other?
That certainly fits what I remember of it.
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  #40  
Old 02-05-2017, 03:53 PM
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Default Dig In

We last left our "heroes" on a mysterious planet in a very large, but still mysterious hole surrounded by three mysterious spots. They've already investigated two of them. At those other two mystery spots, they found a mysterious spaceship (I assume) wreck and at the other mysterious bones.

What mysteries will they find at the final location?





After some more poking around and not finding anything to interact with I do that time honored thing every adventure game player does. I start going through my inventory. Eventually, I get to that weird orb we found in the ship:



Let's wreck it!





"yeah, fuck this planet"





And that's that. There are no more mysteries in this mysterious hole! The trio wander back to the raised platform they came in on:



As soon as they show up that "Weather phenomenon" from the spaceship shows up again!





Everyone seems mostly cool with it.



These are the dumbest astronauts NASA ever sent into space...
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  #41  
Old 02-05-2017, 03:54 PM
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Default They Digged



"Get off my lawn," I'm guessing...



Never have I seen such fantastic logical fallacies thrown out so quickly





Yes, this is the appropriate time to make fun of space ghosts. Right after you've been slingshot across the galaxy...



Low tries to investigate the spot where the "mystery phenomenon" disappeared:



So, Low does what he now does best! DIGS! Now I know where that name comes from!





I don't like Brink but he has a point...





Happy to defer to the "expert."



I'm so glad that my identification of a hole has now been confirmed by an expert. And that Mom has chimed in to be careful!
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  #42  
Old 02-05-2017, 03:55 PM
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Default Too Deep...





Now we get to watch an expert at work!



Every human on this planet could die and I'd be okay with it. I'd say Brink was being sarcastic but he's German so that's impossible.









Sure you were Low. Also, how about all that expertise? "Everything I do is careful!" pfft... One down, two to go.



The yellow rubble road built on Brink's body!

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  #43  
Old 02-05-2017, 03:56 PM
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He's dead Low. Now you have only yourself to wave your dick at.



If all of you had been digging I would have already won this game!



Again, someone fundamentally misunderstands the hierarchical structures.



Are you, though? Not much has been done here today that would support that "responsible" part you mentioned Maggie...



Yes, dividing the party is ALWAYS the best choice when in a hostile, alien environment. Why wasn't Maggie leading this mission from the start?



That is because you are not a complete idiot Low.







Seems like that was an oversight in the planning of this mission and its secret mission aspect.



And I want to die alone on this planet from some unnameable monstrosity I'm sure to run into I will!
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  #44  
Old 02-05-2017, 03:57 PM
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You already said that.



That'll show here Low.



Yet, somehow you were chosen for a mission in SPACE where you would have to work intimately with a team of other people! Who fell asleep for months at NASA?!



You're terrible at this Low.

Tune in next time to see what these two numbskulls find beneath the surface of this alien planet! Hopefully, no one dies?
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