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Kyven
07-04-2008, 12:44 PM
I found this while browsing Warren Ellis' forum (http://freakangels.com/whitechapel/comments.php?DiscussionID=2766&page=1#pgtop):

Apparently, it's an animated series of shorts. This is from the web site Hisstank (http://www.hisstank.com/gi-joe-news/a-real-american-hero-4/?).

G.I. Joe Resolute

Adult themed, PG-13
Highly detailed animation
Designed to bring adult fans back into the market
10 5 minute episodes, 1 10 minute season finale
No distribution decided upon yet.
Could be webisodes, could be tv special, could be DVD, or all 3.
Starts in first quarter 2009
NO LASERS. NO PARACHUTING.
Will have deaths.
Little to no blood (but, from what we've seen, that won't matter)
Focus on core early characters.
No Cobra La.

Producers: Sam Register
Director: Jaoquim De Santos
Writer: Warren Ellis
Lead Animator: Dave Johnson


Cobra Commander, Destro, Baroness confirmed. Lady Jaye more like a Starbuck from Battlestar Galactica type role. Not major player. Cobra Commander is ruthless. Not a clown. Emphasized several times.

Cobra Commander being played by 80s cartoon voice of Tripwire, Charlie Adler.

Ninja moves based on real world techniques.

Real guns, real bullets. No parachuting out of planes right before they blow up. People will die. They said they thought about sniping a guy in a parachute on his way down who actually did make it out of a plane in time.

No direct benchmark for success, will include overall promotion, hits, feedback, news coverage, ratings, eventual DVD sales if sold, etc. But XYZ product making XYZ money doesn't need to happen to continue on, its a brand promotion tool.

Entertainment being done first, and well, to stand on it's own, with product to follow, rather than the reverse. This is first outing with that philosophy


BOTTOM LINE: AWESOME. WHAT EVERY JOE FAN HAS ALWAYS WANTED.

onimaruxlr
07-04-2008, 07:42 PM
i'd be more excited about this if ellis wasn't an evil evil man and if the castlevania DTV he wrote seemed to anywhere near actual production

Egarwaen
07-04-2008, 09:21 PM
I'm reminded of Shortpacked (http://shortpacked.com/d/20050606.html).

Sven
07-07-2008, 08:06 AM
BOTTOM LINE: AWESOME. WHAT EVERY JOE FAN HAS ALWAYS WANTED.

Since the words "Larry Hama" don't appear anywhere in that, I'm calling bullshit on that particular claim.

And, I mean, I love Ellis, but he's the wrong guy for something like this. Shit, I'd take Kojima over him.

Excitemike
07-07-2008, 08:30 AM
NO PARACHUTING.

The only way my Joes fly throught the air is strapped to a bottle rocket.

Kyven
07-16-2008, 05:58 PM
http://www.warrenellis.com/?p=6147


Okay, I meant to get around to this several weeks ago. But, you know, working for a living, etc.

So I wrote what we call a "micro-series" called GI JOE: RESOLUTE. (This has been misreported elsewhere as GI JOE ABSOLUTE, which may give aid and comfort to the people at Hasbro who werenít wild about the title!) Itís an hour long, broken into ten 5-minute episodes and one 10-minute final episode.

It went like this. Sam Register phoned me up and said, weíd really like you to write a GI JOE animation, at a PG-13 rating, aimed at an older viewer. I said, Iíve never seen a GI JOE cartoon in my life. The closest I got to a GI JOE comic was drinking with Larry Hama. Iíve never even seen a GI JOE. Couldnít tell you what they look like if you paid me. I know nothing about GI JOE. It is meaningless in my world.

Excellent, Sam said. Just the guy we need.

It was hard not to notice, at this point, that Sam Register is crazier than a shithouse rat. Therefore I decided to take the job.

I was told, some time after I finished the job, that GI JOE is actually kind of similar to Action Man. "Why didnít they SAY so?" I yelled. Eagle Eyes! Gripping Hands! The Red Devil Action Man who had a hideous accident in a tree during a parachute op in my back garden when I was three years old. The mutilated Action Man whom my grandad found in a lay-by and thereby became default Torture Sequence Action Man for several years. Ah, the 1970s, where setting action figures on fire in the woods was considered part of a healthy childhood.

"Ask them if GI JOE and Barbie can have a really disturbing sex scene where they get naked and then realise they donít have any genitalia," said my girlfriend.

Everyone was so helpful during this project.

Anyway.

So my brief was to produce a non-tiny-child-oriented GI JOE. Which necessitated reading just a toxic amount of research, leading me to birth an odd, lumpy, normal-for-Norfolk-looking hybrid of the comic and the cartoon. The idea was, as I understand it, that bringing in a writer with absolutely no nostalgia for the property would give them the tone they were looking for. I think they were happy when I presented them with the initial list of characters I was going to just kill. And then the list of things I was going to blow up.

The people at Hasbro were actually remarkably supportive. And I did apologise after shouting at them those times. And they did give me one of those conversations that you never really expect to have when growing up:

HASBRO: No, Warren, you cannot wipe Beijing from the face of the earth.

ME: Shit. (pause) What about Moscow?

HASBRO: Wiping Moscow from the face of the earth would be fine.

The point was to write an hour-long story that really put the property and the characters through some shit changes: as if this were the GI JOE film (at the time of my writing RESOLUTE, there still wasnít a locked script on the live-action film) and I was rebooting and re-grounding the property on my own. These sort of gigs are immense technical challenges, and really sharpen up some skills I wouldnít ordinarily use.

One other error in the reportage Iíve seen: someone mentioned Lady Jaye in connection with RESOLUTE. Lady Jaye is not actually in RESOLUTE. Scarlett is the female lead on the Joe side of the story, I guess, although there is another female character on the new Joe team with a significant role. Two probably-beloved characters die in the first five minutes. Snake-Eyes gets to impale someone while travelling at a hundred miles an hour. Cobra Commander isnít very funny any more. Although, really, given that his uniform includes wearing a bag over his head, there are limits to how unfunny he can be at any given time.

RESOLUTE will be screened on the web first, I believe, sometime in 2009.

Hasbro, as I say, were pretty easy to work with, especially given the things I was doing to their toys. The animation team were lovely people, and Iím hoping I get to work with crazy Sam Register again in the future.

Eirikr
07-16-2008, 06:03 PM
I'm a G.I. Joe fan who doesn't really care much about the characters. They're awesome highly-articulated toys with great accessories and that's pretty much been the limit of my love for Joes (but it's still a lot of love).

And to me, this project just seems like a forward apology for the assrape to their childhood fans will have to face once the live action movie comes out.

onimaruxlr
08-11-2008, 09:27 AM
Apparently there was some test footage at Comic Con

http://io9.com/5034838/watch-snake-eyes-slice-open-cobra-soldiers-in-gi-joe-footage

Mm, yes I believe a Yo Joe sentiment is appropriate

KCar
08-11-2008, 09:58 AM
Since the words "Larry Hama" don't appear anywhere in that, I'm calling bullshit on that particular claim.

And, I mean, I love Ellis, but he's the wrong guy for something like this. Shit, I'd take Kojima over him.

You know, I don't know about that. Ellis studies everything he writes about, and while I don't think he's the military nut that Hama is/was, I do believe he'd add enough info to spice up a nicely briskly paced narrative.

Zef
08-11-2008, 10:00 AM
I think they were happy when I presented them with the initial list of characters I was going to just kill. And then the list of things I was going to blow up.

Maybe it's just me, but I thought that a story should develop on its own, and whatever happens to a character should occur naturally as a result of it. Outside of dramas that actually deal with the very concept of death, I don't think I've ever seen anyone start off saying "I'm going to kill off these characters and then write a story that makes those deaths happen."

Paul le Fou
08-11-2008, 10:45 AM
Maybe it's just me, but I thought that a story should develop on its own, and whatever happens to a character should occur naturally as a result of it. Outside of dramas that actually deal with the very concept of death, I don't think I've ever seen anyone start off saying "I'm going to kill off these characters and then write a story that makes those deaths happen."

What you quoted doesn't necessarily discount what you're saying - he may have developed a story beforehand which naturally includes said deaths/explosions. Or, said deaths/explosions may serve as the jumping-off point to the main storyline.

Parish
08-11-2008, 10:57 AM
And to me, this project just seems like a forward apology for the assrape to their childhood fans will have to face once the live action movie comes out.
As far as I can tell the only complaint G.I. Joe fans have about the movie is that OH MY GOD they made Ripcord into a BLACK MAN god what next they're gonna marry our daughters and move next door and there go the property values DAMN YOU WAYAN BROTHERS

onimaruxlr
08-11-2008, 11:19 AM
Huh, most of the complaints I've heard about the movie so far have been about black body armor, not black actors.

Eirikr
08-11-2008, 11:20 AM
As far as I can tell the only complaint G.I. Joe fans have about the movie is that OH MY GOD they made Ripcord into a BLACK MAN god what next they're gonna marry our daughters and move next door and there go the property values DAMN YOU WAYAN BROTHERS

"Hey, Destro doesn't have his mask...OH WOW BARONESS AND SCARLETT ARE REAL THIS TIME AND SO HOTTT..."

I'll be holding some serious reservations until I see it.

The preview of the animation was promising though.

alexb
08-11-2008, 02:09 PM
Maybe it's just me, but I thought that a story should develop on its own, and whatever happens to a character should occur naturally as a result of it.

I don't know. Planned stories tend to have fewer holes. Also, the symbolism has a better chance of being coherent, if there is any.

Zef
08-11-2008, 02:43 PM
I don't know. Planned stories tend to have fewer holes. Also, the symbolism has a better chance of being coherent, if there is any.

Um, that's not what I meant :o I meant writing a story specifically to kill off someone. Like, say, Lucas going "I want this character 'Obi-Wan' to die, so I'll write a story where I can make that happen" versus "I'm going to write a story, and then have a major father-figure bite it to enrich said story."

By the tone of that blog post, the "I want to kill off some characters!" version sounds like the deliberate intent. I'm hoping I'm wrong, though.

le geek
04-23-2009, 07:13 AM
I liked what I saw on AS.com. Nice to see Snake Eyes actually use his sword...

sraymonds
04-23-2009, 07:17 AM
Not a fan of the voice acting but the action's cool.

Violentvixen
04-23-2009, 07:48 AM
Mixed. The dialogue and voice acting are crud, but the action and overall plot are interesting. I liked the bit where Cobra Commander makes it clear he's completely different now. "None of your CRAP!"

Also, A+ on Snake Eyes using the new personal glider things. The Youtube video of those is amazing although I can't find it right now.

Did the original cartoon discuss technology to such an extent? I honestly can't remember.

Sven
04-23-2009, 08:07 AM
Did the original cartoon discuss technology to such an extent? I honestly can't remember.

Nope, but this is Warren Ellis we're talking about. Detailed discussions of science and technology are sort of his thing. The original cartoon had "heavy water" as, well... something other than what it really is.

sraymonds
04-23-2009, 08:18 AM
Also, in the original cartoon, Snake Eyes was cured of radiation poisoning with the help of herbs and Santa.

Sven
04-23-2009, 08:24 AM
Hang on, we need a separate thread for this discussion because it's going to be great.

onimaruxlr
04-23-2009, 02:28 PM
I just want to point out that death, obliteration of Moscow, Snake eyes corpse grenade traps, broken bones, blood aside....this is still essentially Cobra taking over the world via balloons

Warren Ellis is a great man

KCar
04-23-2009, 02:33 PM
this is still essentially Cobra taking over the world via balloons

Warren Ellis is a great man

:eek:

Sven
04-23-2009, 02:42 PM
That's why I love Ellis: in spite of his modern, deconstructionist trappings, he's still a fanboy at heart who loves the goofiness inherent in genre material, just like Grant Morrison.

Contrast that with guys like Mark Millar and Garth Ennis, who genuinely dislike what they're writing half the time (Millar has often said that the only superhero he actually likes is Superman).

onimaruxlr
04-23-2009, 05:44 PM
Ennis at least has the decency to not write the superheroes he hates, unless he's making fun of them in Punisher

O..O~
04-23-2009, 05:53 PM
Ennis at least has the decency to not write the superheroes he hates, unless he's making fun of them in Punisher

If you like Ennis making fun of super heroes, you would loveeee the boys. Does a batman like character with a completely uncontrollable libido sound funny to you? Then you should be reading the boys. Some of it though is a bit hard to read though, like do you really need to have a bit where a female superhero has to give sexual favors to join a supergroup? Ew ennis, ew.

Brer
04-23-2009, 05:53 PM
Contrast that with guys like Mark Millar and Garth Ennis, who genuinely dislike what they're writing half the time

And in at least Millar's case, also seem to dislike his -readers-.

Sven
04-23-2009, 06:33 PM
If you like Ennis making fun of super heroes, you would loveeee the boys. Does a batman like character with a completely uncontrollable libido sound funny to you?

No, because Ennis has written deconstructed versions of the JLA about four times. It's really gotten old at this point; I'm still stunned that Marvel didn't just cut out the middle man and have him as JMS' replacement on Supreme Power.

sraymonds
04-23-2009, 08:53 PM
I'm probably the only person here that hates that there's a Duke-Scarlett-Snake Eyes love triangle.

And that she chose Duke.

O..O~
04-23-2009, 09:16 PM
I'm sure she would want to go to for the guy who never talks. Its a real good basis for a relationship.

So is this going to be a full on series or is what's been released all they are doing?

sraymonds
04-24-2009, 05:03 AM
I'm sure she would want to go to for the guy who never talks. Its a real good basis for a relationship.

It seems to work in the countless number of GI Joe comics.

Sven
04-24-2009, 05:16 AM
I'm sure she would want to go to for the guy who never talks. Its a real good basis for a relationship.

Must... not... make... incredibly... misogynistic... joke....

Kyven
04-25-2009, 01:31 PM
Adult Swim is showing the entire thing tonight at midnight.

impuritor
04-25-2009, 04:02 PM
Adult Swim is showing the entire thing tonight at midnight.

awesome, good to know. I will be sure to watch that.

onimaruxlr
04-25-2009, 10:14 PM
Haw! Springfield

Also Cobra HQ is underneath a Wal Mart

ArugulaZ
04-25-2009, 10:22 PM
This thing is fucking lame. I remember a review of Total Recall where the film critic imagined director Paul Verhoeven shouting, "MORE BLOOD! MORE GUTS!" during every scene. G.I. Joe Resolute is just like that. All right, producers. We get the idea. This isn't your father's G.I. Joe. You're macho and edgy and fill of Boondocksian faux-anime goodness and we don't question your masculinity at all. God, grow up. And stop hiring Steve Blum to do the voice of nearly every male character while you're at it.

onimaruxlr
04-25-2009, 10:31 PM
This thing is fucking lame. I remember a review of Total Recall where the film critic imagined director Paul Verhoeven shouting, "MORE BLOOD! MORE GUTS!" during every scene. G.I. Joe Resolute is just like that. All right, producers. We get the idea. This isn't your father's G.I. Joe. You're macho and edgy and fill of Boondocksian faux-anime goodness and we don't question your masculinity at all. God, grow up.

this is still essentially Cobra taking over the world via balloons


that being said, man, they really DID only use four voice actors!

JDS
04-25-2009, 11:04 PM
Who would have thought G.I. Joe: SERIOUS BUSINESS would have turned out so badly? I hope Dr. Mindbender killed a hooker or something.

Ninja moves based on real world techniques.

If the early UFCs are indication, those techniques are limited to flying kicks that miss the opponent by three feet and tapping out.

Andrew
04-25-2009, 11:07 PM
Can this actually get a real series since they nuked the fridge? :P

I liked it except for the fact that a) Storm Shadow actually is a more shallow character than he should be. Basically, "yeah, I'm an evil bastard/Total Monster!" He's basically if Gouki decided to become a terrorist, for crap's sake! Oh, he's dead anyway. b) probably due to the webisode nature...plus commercials...but pacing seems really disjointed. Like, it takes a long time to move to the next part of a plot thread which are all basically taking place at the same time. c) killing off a lot of major characters means that it would be a really bizarre way to start a new series, unless they ignore it, treat it as just a pilot, and retcon it out/redo it later. d) Tunnel Rat parachuted from the freakin' stratosphere?!?!

sraymonds
04-26-2009, 12:51 PM
So anticlimactic.

Sven
04-26-2009, 12:55 PM
If the early UFCs are indication, those techniques are limited to flying kicks that miss the opponent by three feet and tapping out.

Hey, Steve Jennum was a legit ninja and he won a tournament that included Royce Gracie AND Ken Shamrock!

(... not that he had to fight either, but still... NINJA.)

JDS
04-26-2009, 01:09 PM
Hey, Steve Jennum was a legit ninja and he won a tournament that included Royce Gracie AND Ken Shamrock!

They should have a Ken Shamrock character a la Sgt. Slaughter who quits before every battle, citing exhaustion. FLINT MY HEART

Sven
04-26-2009, 03:01 PM
They should have a Ken Shamrock character a la Sgt. Slaughter who quits before every battle, citing exhaustion. FLINT MY HEART

Nah, he'd quit if forced to battle Serpentor, because he wanted to fight Golobulous instead and it wasn't worth his time to actually save the world if he didn't get to fight who he wanted.

Geez, you can tell how much Shammy hung out in Japan in the 90s - he behaves just like a whiny anime lead.

Balrog
04-26-2009, 06:21 PM
I watched it today and I liked it for the most part. I didn't like that Spike Spiegel voiced 90% of the side characters + Duke. The whole ninja backstory was way out of place too.

Figure Four
04-26-2009, 09:33 PM
I want to watch this, but I have no idea how. I went to the official site and it was too confusing so I gave up. Where am I supposed to view it?

Youtube.

LBD_Nytetrayn
04-26-2009, 09:44 PM
I'm reminded of Shortpacked (http://shortpacked.com/d/20050606.html).

As if on cue... (http://shortpacked.com/d/20090420.html)

Anyway, saw this on Teletoon Friday night, and rather enjoyed it.

onimaruxlr
04-26-2009, 10:29 PM
I want to watch this, but I have no idea how. I went to the official site and it was too confusing so I gave up. Where am I supposed to view it?

http://www.adultswim.com/video/?episodeID=8a25059520b3d89e0120b49221340025

David Cartoon
04-27-2009, 02:42 PM
Finished it last night. As someone whose ONLY Joe toy was Blanka, I thought it was pretty good. Yeah it was over the top, but it worked for what it was.

I am a little curious about people's reactions to Destro though. As said, JOE was not a part of my chirldhood (though I was around), but it looked as though he'd been hittin' the haggis pretty hard...